All right, now that we got that stuffy Bloggins guy outta here we're gonna do things a little different, give yinz some newz you can uze. Maybe they think they're the ones having fun off riding their bikes, dodging farm equipment and eating blowtorch-roasted pig chops. But, NO! The real action is going down at Surly HQ. Read on, you rascally minions:

The spreadsheet artist formerly known as Hairy Jim brought donuts today -- good donuts, too. They were from The Baker's Wife and when donuts are that good one is compelled to use the more formal spelling of 'doughnuts', as a sign of respect. Without Swervy and the PiePlow around we actually got to enjoy a couple, make that several, a piece. Hell, I don't even like donuts, err ... DOUGHnuts, and I ate three. Alix the Great smelled them from her Olympian heights and descended the Ivory Tower to filch one. Yep, they were that tasty. Next time make them all chocolate-iced, Jim.

Staff fashion consultant and authority on all things pop-culture, Emily, joined us in the rowdy den of dank we call the Surly Cave. She moved in last Friday and so far has made a very pleasant addition to the collective Surly orifice, despite her efforts to spearhead the "Keep Donuts Out of the Office" campaign. Good luck, Emily. In fact, you might want to password protect your computer while you're away from your desk. (Especially after recently revealing to the blogosphere a certain unnamed author's most assuredly platonic penchant for Angela Lansbury.)

The Supreme Crack Snacker, Snackey P, made a rare appearance in the above mentioned Cave, considering his normal telecommute takes place from the Steak and Ale all-day happy hour. Look out, Big Tuna, you got some ultimate nacho sauce on your collar.

Brother David's hair continues to grow and he continues to sear the mutton of our brains with tales of packrafts and Pugs traversing Alaska. You did watch the video, didn't you? Scroll down. Click. Do it.

Sov had to duck out early saying he caught some mystery bug from the littl'un. He claimed it wasn't the infamous bottle flu, but we all know the only mystery is attempting to recall how many of which kinds of beverage were indeed consumed last night. Way to take the high road by blaming it on the kid.

Brauer called today and he says, "Hi!" We're all extremely excited to learn he's landed a new job teaching bike safety through derby skills to youngsters in the Mpls public school system. Or was it the parochial school system? Who cares? Learn 'em right, Brauer Power!

I wasn't gonna say anything, but your boss also called. He's a little concerned that you've been working too hard lately. He was gonna wait to tell you this, but it's such good news, why wait any longer? You get tomorrow off! Go ride your bike. Visit Snackey at happy hour. Ride around and get all giddy. Go on! You deserve it!

Now get outta here.