Sweet. Family blog my ass.
Not quite as entertaining as the Shizzolator of a few years back, this link allows you to plug in a URL and it will rate that website so that you'll know if it's too tasty for sensitive shut-ins and children who have been living under a rock.

I tried some others too:
One On One Studio got a G rating. That seems surprising.
Steve Swobo's blog got a G rating also. Computer gatekeepers, apparently, are no match for the nuance of context.
And who better to illustrate that than Christian Televangelist Benny Hinn, whose webpage gets a PG rating.

Things are happening.


Here in MPLS you gotcher Snowball's Chance in Hell:



And then you gotcher Stupor Bowl, also right here in the MiniApple. Organizers say:
"Once again, the Minneapolis Bicycle Messengers are at it again, organizing the 11th Annual Stupor Bowl alleycat to be held in our fair city on the 1st and 2nd of February, 2008. Last year, depite the starting temprature -2 F, over 300 people braved the cold to race in what has turned into one of North America's biggest and longest running alleycat races."

Then there's the Broken Heart Alleycat coming up in Bellingham, WA.



Oh, and in April there's the first ever New Zealand Single Speed Championships. Wouldn't want to miss that. I hear it's bee-yootiful there.



O.k., that's enough shilling for one day.

Apple-cheeked Demanda, a friend who I would describe as a Scenester (something I doubt she'll be happy about, although I bet she'll dig being mentioned here, which strikes me plainly as scenterism), sends this story, about how to identify and deal with infestations of Hipsters. Viz:

"Hipsters are freakishly antisocial; some argue it is genetic. This trait becomes especially magnified in unfamiliar or non-hip environments. So, the last thing you want to do is alienate hipsters further from society than they’ve already alienated themselves. Here are a few things you must understand before attempting to communicate with hipsters:

>Hipsters know more about music than you do.
>Hipsters know more about clothing than you do.
>Hipsters know more about Charles Bukowski than you do.
>Your sense of fashion is “fin” (bad).

Embracing these ideas as fact will not put you on the same level as hipsters—that would be ridiculous—but it will let the hipster know that you are keeping it real, which they can respect, sort of."

Those of you in colder areas of the northern hemisphere may notice more signs of hipsters in your home at this time of year. Like mice and other pests, hipsters will seek shelter from the cold, finding their way into garages, attics, and basements.

Speaking of northern climates, Surly News' unqualified medical correspondent and FNG Warranty Inspections Officer Aaron The Pie Plow has asked that I take a moment to remind everyone of another pesky winter guest, depression. Low sun angle, shorter days, and diets that do not include actual, naturally occuring vitamins can lead to severe, debilitating depression. Get to know the signs, and intervene if necessary. Symptoms of depression include:
>Mustache/beard/sideburns
>Overcoat
>Dour expression
>Continued residency in latitudes at or above that of Kenosha, Wisconsin
>Drinking the same amount as usual but being less excited about it

*************************************************************************************

In actual news, the latest issue of Vancouver's Momentum Magazine arrived in the mailsack yesterday. An excellent example of a bike magazine for the rest of the people who ride bikes (the ones who do not know what next year's XTR looks like, or care), this issue contains a teaser: Momentum will be reviewing longbikes in upcoming issues, longbikes being long wheelbase cargo bikes such as our Big Dummy, the Kona Ute, the Yuba, and the granddaddy that (arguably) started it, the Xtracycle FreeRadical. Keep in mind, they're not merely giving pagespace to acknowledgment of the existence of such bikes, but rather truly testing them, riding them everyday for months, using them for commuting, hauling, and general whatnot, then reporting their findings in the Momentum style, which is to say simple, straightforward, & smart. Get some of that.

A couple of things today:

First, it's cold here in Minneapolis. Here's some proof.



Hinzey rolled into the Q'b farm today on his LHT with a champeen snot-sickle hangin' off his face mask. Grody. Also, the top tube of his bike was glazed like a donut from his effluent. I don't know about you, but I usually can't swim in that kind of personal goo.


Second, to business:

We have loads and loads of complete bikes in stock and ready to go. Long Haul Truckers, Steamrollers, and Cross-checks are clogging the shelves and giving Snack heartburn just looking at them.



Buy them and make yourself squeal with delight.

Truckers will continue to be offered in Utility Blue (which is way cooler than it looks on the web - it's kind of grey/blue and tough.) We will also be offering it in Olive Green (a bit darker than our original Sage, but still awesome, check it.) The Olive will arrive in March. Cross-checks and Steamrollers will remain Black or Misty Mountain Gray and Maroon (chocolatey brown) respectively.


Lastly, a Taiwanese riddle:

Duck Nick works for Surly. Chicken Nick works for our Taiwan agent. We received word today that Duck Nick has defeated Chicken Nick. Duck Nick was able to keep all the 18 year old scotch on the inside. Chicken Nick was not - a couple of times.



This leads us to the following set of axioms (axia?):

Given any competition between a chicken and a duck, we're going to pick the duck every time for the following reasons:

1. Ducks can fight on land and on water - that's amphibious yo. Chickens drown.
2. Ducks can fly. Chickens are slaves to gravity.
3. Duck hunting can be fun and challenging because ducks are wily. Shooting chickens, while potentially fun, is no challenge at all.
4. Chickens work for the Man. They sit quietly as we make them into bullion and steal their eggs. Ducks aren't having that shit.
5. If someone yells "DUCK!" at you, they're trying to help you avoid a low flying object. You should thank them. If someone yells "CHICKEN!" at you, you have to kick their ass.


So, let's recap. It's cold. Buy a bike. Bet on the duck.

-Skip

Big Dummy frame geometry

Now you have it.

Big and Dumb

Big Dummy production is now complete. Thanks to the long ass frame, longer than a tandem, it totally clogged production at the frame and paint shops. As soon as they're boxed up and shipped, they'll be on their way to our warehouse. So we should have them in stock around mid-February.

I've written up a huge spew for our website about Big Dummy that can be found HERE

I’m pretty sure I wrote some kind of New Year’s message in this very forum about this time last year, but to be honest, I’m too lazy to go back through the archives to see if I did or didn’t, or what I wrote, so if any of this sounds familiar I invite you to kick me in the teeth right now.

First of all, I hope all of you had a safe and happy holiday. Mine was safe, and mostly happy, so I suppose that is what that is. The best thing I did, besides hanging out with my family, was to get outside in the Minnesota winter and ride my newly-built Pugsley.

This blog isn’t about that ride. You can click on the picture to go to my flickr site and read more details on that if you’d like. I just wanted to write this because while I was on my bike during the two rides I did over New Year’s holiday, I remembered why it is that I work in the bicycle industry. Yeah sure, there are tons of reasons that I stay: the people, the laid-back atmosphere, great group rides and parties. All that is great, but it isn’t why I stay. The real reason I love this industry is the very same reason I became addicted to cycling 17 years ago while I was living in Japan. Back then the bicycle represented a means of transportation first, and a tool to explore as a way to relieve boredom as an added bonus. But soon I discovered that the bike itself represented freedom and liberation.

I often forget this very important thing. So, as I was riding my bike across Long Lake in Mahtomedi over the holiday it dawned on me (again) that this is what it’s all about for me. Being out on the frozen lake, riding past ice fishermen and snowmobilers I quickly realized that I was at that moment in a place I could not be during the warmer months. Not on a bike anyway. I was in the middle of a snow-covered lake, stopping to talk with ice fishermen and discovering new places I couldn’t get to on my bike during the warm months.

My bike is a tool I use to take refuge from phony business speak, micromanagement, computers and phones, and the blather of the television. I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, but this year I vow to force myself into situations that remind me of what’s important. Freedom. If I owned an inspirational calendar, or if I could put one of these slogan posters on my list to Santa, it would say something like, “Bicycles are freedom. Get some,” or some other such nonsense. But, alas, I’m left just my Pugsley, sub-zero temps and crunchy white pristine snow to ride it in to find that one thing I need but seem to always lose track of.

Our pal Dejay in Arizona is putting on another SingleSpeedArizona race this month. I rode it last year and can vouch that it was by far the best 8-hour ride on 3 hours of sleep after a night of tequila that I bonked in the desert and only hit one cactus during the middle of winter all year. See SSAZ07 Photos